I must LOVE me

I'd love to run away from me
but it seems I'm trapped
can't break free

The me that sees the
horried truth
of which I need
to stay aloof

I look away
like 'normal' folk do
don't bring it
into my full view
       But nosey I am
       always seeking clues
and the 'me' finds them
and then the battle
I lose

For the truths I seek
are painfully real
and on Eureka!
then 'can't hear must feel'

but I can't stop myself
from seeking again
I know the trait
in me will remain
a constant battle
seek truth
           -then pain
                                                                                                            I can expose
                                                                                                                    your Rahs
                                                                                                                                      or
                                                                                                                     go insane

So this catch 22
in which I find
that I can not
remain blind
or silent to what
I see
I best Love
that part called Me

Promised freedom for selling your soul

My wife never sold her soul
To keep her place in rock’n’roll
Even through mind control
MK’ed up she still said ‘NO’!

So just like Amy
They gave her crack-cocaine
Triggered ‘Rah’ alter
And shattered her brain

Left confused
they look insane
told
your never sing again

My wife continued to
Refuse to sell
So she was put through
Living hell




Life handled to have guilt and shame
They took her children
In ‘cares’ name

Each birthday
They asked again
‘Sell your soul
And all this will end’

But she still said ‘No, I’ll pray to the lord
To help me through’
                                                                                                        And he provided
                                                                                                        Mouthy Lou

But she is programmed

Russian doll
Solving problems
Is her goal

But they consented to mouthy Lou
Cos she was being trouble to
She had set up on her own
And didn’t heed to a tapped phone

Let’s burn Lou out
Trying to save the child
Revoked care order
They returned her wild

Programmed to cause mayhem
Problem-solving arose again
Found the answer ‘mind control’
Wherein required to sell the soul

Deprogramming skills mastered to find
 many jig -saw pieces
of memory behind
amnesic walls
created to hide
multiple matters
of the dark side

Amoungst horrors
of nightmare trauma’s
were hidden births of babies
memories of daughters

in search to find the daughter by name
thinking the search may be in vein
we found a son
there was no doubt
the memory of his birth came out



and within his profile

the daughter we found
same facial expression
and vocal sound

memories of more children
came through
and an alter that is’ to return you’

plus a man appeared
from back a day
maybe worked for C.I.A.
an alter recognized him with fear
what happened after I’m not clear

but communication broke down
her smile turned to a frown
the alter didn’t like me in her space
wanted me gone without a trace

but the strategic removal of my ID
and the precise planning
it is clear to me
that the alter alone did not plan our split
but someone operated it


for much of the plan went pear shape
the plan was to control me with red tape
but I just drove away
left all behind
no answer to the actions I could find

So only time will bring to light
how many have to fight
against hidden slavery
where they asks for your soul
to set you free

I feel for you

Waking up to find myself
in another place to you
I feel I'm lost
and need to move
and find things to do

dis-orientated in my mind
my present life
I need to remind
myself I now am alone
and I can't call you on the phone

I can't hear you
see you no more
my heart is broke
the tears do pour






Time passes by
but change don't come
for you are my number one

My heart is joined to your soul
a constant flow of tears do roll

I can't believe this life is true
I can't believe I'm without you

I occupy my time and mind
but always awake to find
Im still alone
without you
and tears pour out
it can't be true




I stop my brain , from thoughts of what might be
for they only serve to re-
traumatize me
but although I stop them
they still come through
then I ball cos I feel for you